I’m a Disney junkie. I’m not afraid to say it. Over the past twenty-five years, no other company has brought more joy to my life than that of Walt Disney’s Animation Studios.
And this week, I reached a milestone in my life; I have finally seen every one of Disney’s fifty “Animated Classics”, the theatrical releases that Disney proclaim part of their official animation canon. Starting in 1937 with Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, right up to this year with their most recent venture Tangled, I have, for best and worst, seen and engorged myself upon their creative output.
And so, in celebration, I have decided to do my own personal countdown, rating them from top to bottom; best to worst. From fifty to the big Numero Uno.
Of course, before we go on, it should be noted exactly as to what a “Disney Classic” actually is. A “Classic” is a full length animated motion picture that is produced by The Walt Disney Animation Studios. It does not include any features made by other companies, but distributed by Disney (thus ruling out the likes of The Brave Little Toaster and The Wild), nor does it include Disney/Pixar films (Toy Story, et al). Also excluded are films made by DisneyToon Studios (A Goofy Movie, DuckTales: Treasure of the Lost Lamp, as well as most of the Disney sequels, excluding The Rescuers Down Under, The Three Caballeros and Fantasia 2000). These are the big ones.
So here’s the countdown, starting this week with numbers fifty to forty-one.
50. Chicken Little (2005)
Someone had to come in last, and unfortunately Zack Braff’s Little Hen that Could is easily the worst of the bunch. The first Disney Classic in 3D is also embarrassingly short, painfully unfunny and unfortunately lacking of a decent plotline. Notably, this was the first film made after Disney decided to stop making 2D animated features (a wise choice? Perhaps not…)
49. Dinosaur (2000)
The new century saw Disney attempting their own computer-generated world in the lack-lustre Dinosaur. Whilst the animation was impressive for the time, this simply lacked the charm of a Pixar movie, and the storyline was really, really boring. I’m sure my younger brother, a follower of the cult of Aladar, will argue with me, but CGI aside, Dinosaur just wasn’t very good.
48. Saludos Amigos (1942)
When the war came, and along with it the first animators’ strike, Disney found their budgets somewhat restrained, and thus set about making a series of compilation films, piecing together a number of shorts in order to tell a story of sorts. This, set in Brazil and featuring a series of rather uninteresting tales, was the first of them, and also, more importantly, the first of Disney’s war propaganda films (followed two years later by the much more memorable The Three Caballeros) intended to strengthen relations between the US and Latin America. Unfortunately, baring the introduction of the wisecracking Brazilian parrot Jose Carioca, and a quite fun bit about Gaucho Goofy, this is a film only the purists remember.
47. Brother Bear (2003)
Oh, Brother Bear… Perhaps the only thing notable about this yawn-worthy attempt to cash in on the success of its Native American predecessor Pocahontas is that it’s the only Disney movie that has ever managed to put me to sleep. It’s a nice enough story; Ice Age hunter dies, and gets reincarnated as a bear, only to discover that what was pray is perhaps more human than the man he once was. It’s just a bit naff.
46. Treasure Planet (2002)
Treasure Planet is a film that had promise. Treasure Island? Great book. In space? Well, yes, if you will. Unfortunately, as befalls the book, our central character, Jim, is a bit of a douche. The animation is alright. Not up to the standards of the early nineties boom, but alright nonetheless, and everyone’s favourite antihero, Long John Silver, is well portrayed. It’s just that “Beware the cyborg” doesn’t quite have as much ominousity as the traditional wooden leg.
45. Atlantis: The Lost Empire (2001)
I must admit, we had arguments over this one did me and me old mum. On first viewing, I really enjoyed it; my own fascination with the lost continent, coupled with a love for Michael J. Fox blind-sighted me to the shoddy animation and, most notably, lack of musical numbers. That said, it’s a fun romp, marred only by the fact that a lot of the film is sub-titled, rendering it rather troublesome for younger viewers.
44. Meet the Robinsons (2007)
I guess there’s nothing wrong with 2007’s Meet the Robinsons. Indeed, it’s not a bad film. It’s just forgettable. The Jetsons style approach to the future is obvious, and the ending can be seen from a mile off, even by the smallest family member. It’s not bad. But have you seen it? Probably not. And for a Disney film, that says enough.
43. Fun and Fancy Free (1947)
Another, somewhat better, wartime compilation picture is 1947’s Fun and Fancy Free, one which has become rather lost in the annuls of time. But despite that, having now cleared the chaff of mediocrity, we do find some cinematic gems in this charming little film. Firstly, there’s a live-action cameo with Mr. Disney himself in a delightful interview with his most famous creation, before everyone’s favourite rodent leads an expedition to the giant’s lair in the wonderful Mickey and the Beanstalk. It’s fun, and there’s certainly an air of fancy free-ness about it.
42. The Black Cauldron (1985)
The Black Cauldron is an odd one, and has, rightfully to a degree, disappeared into obscurity to a certain extent. Historically important as being the first Disney film to use CGI (not, as I once though The Great Mouse Detective, and certainly not Beauty and the Beast – a sore spot after a heated argument with a certain arrogant moo a few years ago now…), and also for being one of Tim Burton’s first major motion pictures. Unfortunately, its dark content caused audiences to turn away; after all, who wants to come out of a Disney film feeling shaken and depressed? Certainly not me folks!
41. Melody Time (1948)
I saw this for the first time this week, finally completing my viewing back-catalogue. It’s nice. Not as good as the earlier Make Mine Music, and certainly no Fantasia, but there are specks of gold dust in this forgotten classic, most notably the tale of Little Toot, a tug boat whose story is regaled by The Andrews Sisters, and the lovely Winter Story. Unfortunately, it’s let down by a rather lack-lustre second half, consisting of The Tale of Johnny Appleseed and Pecos Bill, narrated by Roy Rogers. Indeed, had the first half of this been spliced with the second half of Make Mine Music, allowing the other segments to be peacefully laid to rest, a fantastic film would have been created. Oh well.
So that’s numbers fifty to forty one… Next week, we’ll be starting to hit the real gold dust. Will your favourites be up there? What will be number one?? Will anyone really care???
There’s only one way to find out!
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