Ahoy hoy! Tarquin the TV otter here. Each week I shall be taking you, dear readers into the dark and wonderful past that is TV years gone by, offering y'all my unique look on televisual days gone by. This week's voyage into nostalgia is a topis I hold most dear to my heart; the TV world of Walt Disney. Known foremostly for their work on the big screen, the Disney Corporation have also produced some of the finest family programming of the last thirty years. So, without further ado, I give you the run down...
10. Talespin (1990-1991)
An often forgotten little gem that featured the cast of The Jungle Book as the residents of a sleepy Caribbean island, with Baloo flying a delivery plane lovingly named the Sea Duck alongside his trusty young bear companion.
With King Louie running a cocktail bar, and Shere Khan the megalomaniac owner of a multinational corporation, this show not only featured one of the greatest theme tunes of all time, but some delightfully satirical storylines. It also happens to be one of the few Disney shows to have had an episode banned for promoting terrorism. So everybody wins!
9. Hannah Montana (2006-2010)
A questionable choice some may say, but this delightfully twee “best of both worlds” show is actually, under the saccharine surface, pretty good fun.
It’s a story everyone knows, I’m sure; Miley Cyrus plays Miley Stewart (see what they did there) Daughter of Billy Ray Cyrus… I mean Stewart… who is by day an average teenager, but by night peroxide pop sensation Hannah Montana.
The concept in itself is as trite as Hannah’s hideously teeny-bop songs, but what makes the show curiously watchable is the acting talents of its young stars. Not Cyrus herself, obviously, but her young confidantes are all filled with pep and some surprisingly sharp comic timing. And Billy Ray… Well, it’s a performance just as hilarious as his stint on Dancing With The Stars.
8. Fillmore! (2003-2004)
Another show that rather disappeared into obscurity was this deliciously cutting detective noir animation that took place in the hallways of X Middle School. Indeed, with the cancellation of Disney Club and its offspring, I’m not sure the show even made its way to terrestrial screens.
The premise is nothing short of genius; juvenile delinquents Cornelius Fillmore and Ingrid Third are set to work as undercover operatives for the school’s safety patrol programme, taking down crime such as chalk theft and water bombing whilst juggling their own academic curricula. Cutting wit and gorgeous animation seemed lost on audiences though, and the show was prematurely axed after just one season.
7. Ducktales (1987-1990)
Life was indeed like a hurricane in the bustling duck-opolis of Duckberg, home to the multimillionaire Scrooge McDuck and his unlikely wards Huey, Dewey and Louie.
Always off on bird-brained treasure hunts alongside their plethora of stalwart chums (well, employees to be technical about it, though to I doubt any of them ever signed a health and safety form), Ducktales introduced us to a host of memorable characters, most notably the accident-prone Launchpad McQuack (who shall be resurfacing later), the crackpot inventor Gyro Gearloose, and of course the cyborg superhero Gizmoduck.
It may seem surprising that this classic didn’t rate higher in the top ten, especially since it maintains the record for one of Disney’s longest running animated TV series, but quite frankly, as good as it was, there’s been better. And most of them don’t have annoying ducklings perpetually getting into ridiculous scrapes involving lucky dimes.
6. Chip ‘N’ Dale: Rescue Rangers (1989-1990)
One thing that riles me up something rotten, possibly more than an evening with Michael McKintyre, is the confusion that the general populous seems to have when it comes to the Rescue Rangers. They are NOT the pairing of Eva Gabor and ... who not only saved young Penny from a crazy lady with crocodiles before returning twenty years later, not having aged one day, to rescue young Cody and his golden eagle companion from the clutches of an evil poacher. Nor are they a trio of singing chipmunks who need to be shot.
They are however Disney’s old favourites Chip and Dale, coupled with cheese loving Monterey Jack and sexy brainiac Gadget. Oh, and Zipper the bluebottle. It’s not difficult kiddies. Interestingly, however, the original pitch did not utilise Chip and Dale, rather (if I remember correctly) a squirrel and a lizard. The execs decided, probably for the best, that some familiar faces would be more appealing.
Rescue Rangers was a great show to say the least. Whether riding around in a roller-skate car, or fighting off robot cats, Chip and Dale always managed to create original and compelling storylines, along with one of Disney’s finest villains; the corpulent Fat Cat. So remember, sometimes some crimes go slipping through the cracks, but these two gumshoes are picking up the slack. Fact.
5. Dinosaurs (1991-1994)
Suburban middle American family life has been the subject of many a sitcom, and when it comes to the perfect presentation of the working man and his loving tribe, the Sinclairs certainly laid the nest egg.
Created in association with the Jim Henson Company, the prehistoric American world was brought to life through some state of the art puppeteering and animatronics, coupled with a sharp satirical tongue and some very mature themes considering the alleged target audience of the show.
Of course, the one thing that will always ring true for Dinosaurs is Baby Sinclair’s perpetual cry of “Not the Mama!”, though the series’ finale, in which extinction falls upon our heroes will forever strike a poignant note of the fragility of a seemingly stable lifestyle.
4. Bonkers (1993-1995)
After the runaway success of the live action/animation amalgamation that was Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, Disney decided in the early nineties to commission a TV series with a similar concept. A human detective would be coupled with an animated side-kick to solve mysteries and murders in the larger than life Toon Town.
Unfortunately, the big-wigs refused to put up the collateral necessary for such a venture, and Bonkers was sent back to the drawing board. Keeping to the same script, the show was created, though this time entirely animated. Of course, the problem therein is that having a cartoon detective (human albeit) claiming to “hate toons” doesn’t quite pack the same punch.
That said, Bonkers was great fun, and it’s a shame that it seems to be long since forgotten by most viewers. Hilarious, weird, wired and in the same moment somehow touching, this was probably not a patch on the visual delight it could have been, but nonetheless does not deserve the obscurity it has attained.
3. Wizards of Waverly Place (2007-Present)
In the late nineties, the world fell in love with Sabrina. Of course, looking back, and having watched the complete series back-to-back recently, it’s actually quite hard to see why. Sure, Sabrina herself was perky and peppy, and Salem certainly made for worthwhile viewing, but on the whole, and especially during the last four seasons, Sabrina was somewhat lacklustre.
So now, with open arms, we welcome the Disney Channel’s cheeky little number Wizards of Waverly Place, a charmingly wicked hit amongst both tweeny-pop girls and this embittered critic.
Basic premise? The Russo family run a sandwich shop in downtown NY, and they just happen to be wizards. That’s about the crux of it. In a post-Potter world, it’s nothing original, but the performances of the kids (most notably the delightful Selina Gomez) partnered with a sardonic and yet family friendly script gives this show the much needed sparkle that our screens have been lusting for.
2. Darkwing Duck (1991-1992)
This legendary series’ place at the top stood in my eyes for many years. The Terror That Flaps in the Night was indeed one of my childhood heroes, and only a few years ago I donned a purple cape for a fancy dress night on the town.
Darkwing was one of two spin-offs from its predecessor Ducktales (the other being the rather sub-par Quack Pack) and featured Duckberg heroes Launchpad McQuack and Gizmoduck aiding our purple-clad protagonist.
Darkwing spent many dark and lonesome nights protecting the mean streets of Cape Canard from miscreants such as the ad-quoting Liquidator, washed up walrus actor Tuskerninni and the Holmesian deviant Moliarty before finally finding peace with his true love, the gothic Morgana Macawber.
Some of the finest characters in Disney history formed this heirloom of animation, which will have a generation of Disneyphiles crying “Let’s get dangerous” for many years to come.
1. Kim Possible (2002-2007)
Quite honestly, I could write an entire dissertation on KP. In fact, had I gone with my original proposal, The Teenage Cheerleading Superhero in Popular Culture, I probably would have done. So I shall try to keep in brief.
Kim Possible tells the tale of the eponymous heroine as she struggles with day-to-day high school life, whilst at the same time saving the world from her hap-hazard arch-nemesis Dr. Drakken on a twice-daily basis. Along the way, she is aided by her eventual beau, the clumsy but lovable Ron Stoppable and his pet naked mole rat Rufus (Ron’s father has a fur allergy…), along with the screen-bound whiz kid Wade Load.
Minor villains are, naturally, a nuisance, and the folks as Disney out-do themselves with some truly inspiring foes. We have Professor Monty Fisk (or “Monkey Fist” as he becomes known), who surgically removes his hands and feet, replacing them with those of a chimpanzee. Then there’s Duff Killigan, the world’s deadliest golfer, and of course the gorgeous but deadly Shego, the only one of the bunch with half a brain. And she’s supposedly the sidekick.
Kim Possible combines everything required for an epic kids’ TV show; action, adventure, romance, and rip-roaring hilarity, but never once talking down to its audience, thus creating a true masterpiece of family entertainment.
In Kim Possible, the Disney team live up to their own hero’s motto; they can indeed do anything.
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